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Discussion Starter #1
i just got home from the club and have been thinking about this all the way home. my ex and i were at the bar at the same time closing our tabs and her card was declined. i ended up paying for her tab with a phat tip. was i in the wrong? or was i just being a nice person who actually cares for people i know?

keep in mind she did pay for our entire trip to europe 3 years ago before we broke up...
 

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Moderator
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was that a suggestive "you know you still want me" offer??
Did you make her notice you were leaving a "phat tip"?

To be honest, I wouldn't have :thumbsdown:
I'd offer to cover so that she can pay me back, but no way i'm picking up her tab.

From the details that I remember of your breakup, I would say you're still not completely over her.
 

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jon still has my hrt RIP
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You did a nice thing. What goes around comes around. Just leave it at that and don't think about it too much.
 

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B cuz I got it like that.
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hellz no... because the guy who said her card was declined.... was her new boyfriend... you just got punked.
 

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MECP Cert'd Bish
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Jesus, do we keep tabs of all the members' love lifes now? :laugh: I don't know your history, but it depends on you and your ex's current relationship. I have one ex that I'm good friends with (after we had many years as a healling period), but I have another ex that I wouldn't piss on if she were on fire. :shrug:
 

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Premium Member
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Just out of curiosity... were you actually with your ex at the bar, or did you just happen to be closing tabs at the same bar at the same time? If you are friendly enough with her to hang out at the bar with her, then I definitely don't see a problem with covering her tab (as long as it wasn't >$50). If you just happened to be at the same place at the same time... it's a little more complicated, but still OK, as long as you don't expect anything in return. It was a good deed that you did because you're a nice guy... feel good about yourself and leave it at that.

Either way, she should pay you back, but if you didn't agree on that when you paid the tab, then you shouldn't expect her to, and you shouldn't bring it up if she doesn't.
 

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Tall-Scott
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^I would assume it was way over $50 or else he wouldn't be making such a big deal about it.

I'm with Marcus, if you're hanging out at a bar with her, then you guys are friends and as long as you two can keep your pants zipped and your feelings in check you should have no problems doing nice things for each other that are reserved for friends.

Even if you two aren't civil and the bill was fairly small, I can still understand you helping someone out in an embarassing situation...especially someone you deeply care for. She'll offer to pay you back if she was ever worth a sliver of your time.
 

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ExodusFX said:
Jesus, do we keep tabs of all the members' love lifes now? :laugh: I don't know your history, but it depends on you and your ex's current relationship. I have one ex that I'm good friends with (after we had many years as a healling period), but I have another ex that I wouldn't piss on if she were on fire. :shrug:

The relationship stuff is fun to read and comment on. I like to post my own drama every now and then. :)

Now... as far as paying for her, I dunno. It obviously does depend on how your current relationship with her is. However, if you over extended yourself or went out of your way (I'm guessing you didnt because of you "phat tip"), then that would have been wrong. If you guys are still friends or at least talk to one another and it was no big deal for you to pay, then no, I dont think it was out of place.

Shane
 

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I'm white
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note to self: go to bar with brian and make sure to close tab when he does.......and give him a *wink*

i think you did a cool thing, i couldn't go to a bar with my ex there. i'm guessing it was more than 50 bux then yeah..........i would expect her to do something about it or pay me back someway

and why the heck was her card declined anyways? she shops too much
 

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Discussion Starter #17
ok to go into a little more detail about the situation, i went up to the bar to get one last drink and close my tab. she came up a few minutes later to do the same (one last drink and close her tab). after her card was declined she got this worried look on her face, and i could tell that she was starting to panic a little bit. i pulled my card back out and gave it to the bartender. my ex even tried to stop me, but i can't let people i know and care about be in distress over simple matters like this. her tab was only $36, so i put $50 more on my card... not that big of a deal if you ask me. after that she told me how embarrased she was and said thank you and good bye. the only thing i asked her to do is to try and keep in touch a little bit better... say hi if we're both online, approach me in the club and start talking... that sort of thing.

now a little background about our relationship... we were best friends and lovers for 2 months shy of 3 years. she broke up with me to "explore her options". in the last 2 years since we've split up, she has not talked to me very much and it kind of hurts (she gave the "lets keep in touch and still be friends" speach but didn't keep up her end of the bargain). i've grown up and gotten over it and i'm still friendly when i do see her, but i'm completely over any feelings i once had for her.
 

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SuperMod
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^ditto, $50 is cheap for the dig you got in.

In my world, that costs a minimum of 5 bills :eek:

So I run. And I live. :laugh:

Run and you will live at least awhile. And dying in your bed many years from now,
would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for
one chance, just one chance, to come back here as young men and tell
our enemies that they may take our lives but they will never take
our freedom!
:rockon:
 

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PO.Com's E-Pimpologist
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3,352 Posts
i have a similar relationship with my ex. same speech same thing afte 3 years, she want to be friends but doesn't communicate too much, i seem to do more of the meassaging.

i would have done the same if i caan cover it. i know your short on cash... so it made you a better man, if she knew, i am sure she would try to pay you back.
 
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