yes, very common. As I said in the other thread, it may just be easier to slide the relay out of the housing rather than tearing apart your panels. I found it easy at least.
The main relay sends power to the ecm and fuel injectors as well as the fuel pump, which is supposed to turn on for 2 seconds when you first put your ignition in the "on" position (or whatever it is). One way to tell is to listen for a "click" coming from under your dash about a second after you turn your key - don't start the car, just put the key in the position right before you start it, when all the lights come on - then listen for a click.
Don't know why your dealer hates you newb